HOW I WOULD SPEND MEGA MILLIONS WINNINGS

I know we all fantasize about how we would spend great amounts of money, even just for a little bit. But last night, I was talking to my mom on Facebook and we were really delving into what we would spend that money on, since the Mega Millions are up to $550 million (about $250 mil take home). So, I thought, where better to share my thoughts of this than in a public forum?

So here's a list of ways I would spend Mega Millions winnings:

1. I would buy two new cars. I'd buy a Jeep Wrangler and probably something sensible like a Prius or a Camry. XM Radio and whatnot too.
2. I'd buy two MacBook Pros. Just because I could.
3. Think my 4S could use an upgrade to the 5SOS or whatever's coming up next.
4. I'd pay my rent through the end of my lease.
5. I'd buy an apartment outright in New York City.
6. I'd rent a place in Los Angeles, where I'd grow my own year round garden of vegetables.
7. I'd go visit my place in Los Angeles and get my hair and nails done at the best salon.
8. I'd see the best god damn dermatologist in the world.
9. Personal trainer, right?
10. I'd hire a masseuse and pay them an outrageously large salary.
11. I'd hire an on-call dessert chef.
12. I'd always have $100s in my pocket and I'd give them to awesome strangers.
13. I'd donate a gross amount to the Trevor Project.
14. I'd defunct The Salvation Army (and their homo-hating ways) with a replacement organization that won't ring terrible bells in your face during the holidays. Instead, they'll be inside and will offer you a delightful snack or a coupon for wherever it is you are.
15. I'd buy my own public access channel and use it for fun sketches and to expose up and coming interesting people.
16. I'd buy one of everything at a Sephora and pay the women in Victoria's Secret to leave me alone while I shop for intimates.
17. I'd have a closet dedicated to material crap like nailpolish and lipgloss.
18. I'd have fifty denim shirts and wear them everyday for fifty days.
19. I'd take a trip to Europe on a whim and be there as long as I'm there.
20. I'd give about half of the money to my mother, who would undeniably do the same for me.

The fact is, I grew up dirt poor. I'm basically dirt poor right now. I've never known what it's like to have money. I have a hard time saying I'd buy a home theater or a Ferrari. Those things aren't practical for me. I don't think if I had money I could make my life more about things than sharing the wealth. It sounds lame and I can hear you calling shenanigans on me, but I truly think money can make you happy, but not when you use it to replace experiences with things.